Le Bilan

Le bilan is the French way of saying "the evaluation." And I guess I'm at that point now -- time to evaluate this experience, as it's rapidly coming to an end. I'm sorry I haven't been updating as of late, it's been finals week and things have been crazy and I am in fact finishing up my last paper as I procrastinate by writing this. But still, the experience is almost over and it's time to analyze, or at least attempt to, anyways. I know that I'll never fully be able to evaluate or even really put into words this experience, but I'm going to attempt to for you all and my own sanity. First of all, I want to say how amazingly positive this whole semester was. While it obviously took some adjustment time (in terms of getting to know the city, the language barrier, the people on my program) in the beginning, I really feel like I have an an overall extremely positive experience and learned so much. Cliche, perhaps, but I have become so much more comfortable with myself and knowledgeable about such a broader range of subjects. I feel like I am really one of those people now who can talk intelligently about art and ideas and culture and traveling and who knows how to eat at a nice restaurant and live in a city, all things I always wished I was better at. And yes, while I didn't climb any literal mountains this semester or live in a place without running water and/or electricity, I still feel as if I grew as a person in an emotional and academic way. I worked hard this semester -- I wrote papers in French, went to a French school, and gave presentations to native speakers. I feel like I have a much clearer sense of the things that interest me academically and personally, and I have better ideas as to how to pursue those. I also made great strides in the language, and that in itself was a journey all of it's own. I feel like I really know Paris, and am certainly more comfortable with city life, and I made some amazing friends and traveling companions along the way.

It's interesting because I've been talking to a lot of my friends recently about their study abroad programs and they have all used the term "life-changing." Most of them went to third world countries where their experience was uncomfortable and physically difficult, and while they say that every moment of their semester was horrible, looking back on it is awesome and they had a great time and really grew as people. I think for me, this experience was not life-changing but life-cementing. I feel like I really got a better idea of who I am and the things I like to pursue, and while I didn't push myself past my physical boundaries (in terms of staying in a first world country, etc) I still feel like I gained so much other knowledge from this experience and cemented so many skills I thought I had but actually didn't. While I'm jealous that my friends got pushed so far out of their comfort zones, I think that I was able to hone skills that will be useful to me in the future and I got a chance to work on a language I would like to be fluent in, both of which were difficult and challenges in their own way, and I feel like I've become much more comfortable with myself this semester. I loved being in Paris, and I can't wait for when I'll be able to return to this place with people I love and share with them part of this incredible journey.

So yeah! I guess that's it! Thanks all of you for reading this blog and I really hope you enjoyed at least half of what I had say, or just the pure entertainment value of it all. It's been a wonderful journey and I'm sad that it's wrapping up but also excited to return to "real" life and get back to school and fall into my routines again. Again, thanks for being an audience and if you're ever going to Paris -- you know who to call!

Parting shots of Paris.

Paris je t'aime!